Friday, January 8, 2010


Just got back from my friday fellowship, which I regularly attend every friday, such an oasis where I can be with the group of youth, praising, worshipping, sharing thoughts, and growing in faith together. I've learned a lot from this awesome family and so have I today.

The theme for today's message was CELEBRATION IN TIME. It emphasizes on how God has planned everything for us and makes them happen in His own time. Yes, His very own time which is beyond my limited intelligence and understanding of what's good and what's not.

I have personally experienced how God has not let me get what I wanted and how hard it was to face failures yet later on my eyes were also opened to see how God has replaced it with something bigger and better which I never thought of before. By rooting to this principle of He makes everything beautiful in His time, I've never been let down by failures because I know they all happen for reasons, for the better.

The first 3 months of this semester, I had been complaining that I barely got my turn in McDonalds, where I've been working for the past months, because new people are coming so they need to divide the available time equally, which means, less turn for me to work and automatically, less monthly income. I worried a lot, and I did cry wondering how I would be able to save up and pay my tuition fee.
Before the christmas break, I also struggled to find another part time job yet I found none.

In my lowest point, I was reminded of how I had been dragged away from God. I started to listen to online sermons and God did speak to me through those messages. I realized how I had changed. I forgot that whatever happens in my life, is a part of God's plan. I had been busy moaning about the little hole and forgot to sit back, relax, and enjoy the whole picture.

I went back to Him and found how He opened the ways for me to earn money. I applied for two scholarships and passed both of the 1st screenings. I couldn't find part time job to do during the Christmas break because God wanted me to enjoy the break and let me go for a little getaway to another city, well He even provided enough money for me to shop and live a proper living up to this very moment even though I have less part time job schedule. And I have more time to study during the weekend.

Now that I look back, I see how what I thought were failures unexpectedly turned out to be blessings I couldn't recognize back then. So I am thankful that He has brought me back to Him and here I am, healthy, prosper, and with many hopes I've pinned on Him looking to be made come true, or to be replaced with something better.
Yes, I am crossing finger for the sponsorship result that will decide whether I'll go to London or not this February, and 2 scholarships result that will provide me enough money to pay my tuition fee, monthly living cost for the whole year, even my trip back home ;)

A lot to hope indeed yet I know, I put those hopes on the right hands.

"..Then You know that I am the Lord; those who hope in ME will not be dissapointed.."
Isaiah 49:23

Sunday, January 3, 2010


ive decided to write down my resolutions and dreams. so by the end of the year I can see what I've done, and how my dreams come true, or are replaced by some other plans God has prepared for the better.
Here goes the list.

- no sleeping in class
- no more job cancellation, skipping church and fellowship for unnecessary excuses
- read the subject materials before class
- fast every Monday and Thursday
- browse for internship
- no more bible reading on the bus. it must be AT HOME before school
- night devotion is compulsory
- less complaining
- go back to taiko practices
- learn Spanish and French
- more social work

- daikin, kyushu oil, and honor scholarship *huge AMEN for these*
- academic merit awards (which also means 4 GPA)
- indonesia in February, Europe in summer break
- internship at British Council London
- perfect health for my family and the best university for my sister
- one piece from each of these: complex geometries, chloe sevigny for opening ceremony, junya watanaba for garcons, alexander wang, and well I basically wont resist anything from Oaknyc and reform :)